How not to tell me something

"If you drive my car tomorrow I should warn you about something." Thanks. I think. "There are three bottles of wine in the back." So that's what she does when she "goes shopping". My mom went grocery shopping every two weeks. She goes a couple times a week. "I'm going to a girls' get together thing." What's that? Another name for a girls' drunkfest? She goes on to tell me who's going to be there, where it's at, etc. I can feel my negativity knob slowly turning up. "And is this event scheduled yet?" "It's tomorrow." How am I supposed to find out about stuff? Oh yeah. I either overhear her talking about it on the phone or I check the calendar periodically. Well I haven't heard her talk about it and it's not on the calendar. "I thought I told you." The interrogator in me suggests that isn't consistent with the way she just told me she's going to a girls' whatever-it-is as if I didn't know about it. Here comes the badness. "If you assume you never tell me anything you'll be closer to the truth." "Well I'm telling you now then." When would she have told me if the warning about her car hadn't come up.

I can't stop. Let's find another point to grind on. "But you don't even drink wine." Thanks to her interesting diet. "Maybe I just don't drink at home." Stab through the heart. "But what does it matter?" "I just thought you might want to bring something that you'd enjoy drinking." "Water is my favorite thing to drink, and I'm sure she's got that." So she has to compensate by bringing social lubrication for everybody else? Nice crowd she hangs with.

Here's the rub. I have to be gracious about this. Social River is, to a point, happy River. Happy River is friendly River. Friendly River is, not quite horny River, but at least "I would do it with you tonight" River. (In case you were wondering what this all has to do with fucking.) And truly I'm happy to be gracious about it. I'd want her to do the same for me. And she would.

But that's how not to tell me something.